My late brother Barry, like many men of his generation, was socialized to believe that being a man meant being the breadwinner, being right all the time, being in charge, and having everything in his life exactly as he dictated. By the time he left our family home at the age of seventeen, his mental models were set, largely by the autocratic, violent example our father provided, despite the two of them being so antagonistic toward each other.

When we are taught that our identity is tied to specific characteristics such as intelligence or strength, any contradiction of those qualities…



Sandy Bliss

I write personal essays exploring contemporary issues and the arts, and about finding joy and beauty despite degeneration, pain and increasing disability.

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